Just another typical day for me

It's Monday, the very same Monday with the same writing routine for me. I guess I've been bogged down with some unnecessary distractions emotionally and physically. I am tired, frustrated and bored. Its like I don't have much control with my life anymore. Shall I say this is absolutely unfair? Nauzubillah, I am not complaining Allah for this. I am complaining myself, who looks like a tiny little girl, alone and scared.

I know whining in silence leads to nothing, and it might not right to expect people around you to understand it, or to expect your loved ones to make an effort to show that you deserved to be taken care of - emotionally. I guess the reason of the silence is I've lost my very good listener years ago. And this is the most pathetic tragedy in my life. But please, don't be sorry for what is happening to me. This is just a crazy-rubbish writing that has no guaranteed contribution to anyone. Or might not be related to anyone.

And all of these complicated PhD stuffs make me even more tired. What worries me is that i will stop bothering about being anxious, as I always be. Well, being anxious is good for me, as it helps my body to trigger the hormone that keeps me working. i don't know. You might disagree with me.
But the truth is I am terribly in trouble as I think I'm a bit lost! It feels like you are heading to somewhere but you end up being at the very same spot again. Its frustrating and upsets me so much as I'm used to be ahead of the plan.

Will need to recompose myself again. Lailahailla anta subhanaka inni kuntu minazzalimin!